Avenue Q: The Internet Is For Porn

Kate Monster: Finally, I get to teach a whole lesson all by myself. And I'm gonna teach something relevant, something modern - the Internet!
The Internet is really really great
Trekkie Monster: For porn!
Kate: I've got a fast connection so I don't have to wait.
Trekkie: For porn!
Kate: What? There's always some new site.
Trekkie: For porn!
Kate: I browse all day and night.
Trekkie: For porn!
Kate: It's like I'm surfing at the speed of light...
Trekkie: For porn!
Kate: Trekkie!

Trekkie: The Internet is for porn!
Kate: Trekkie!
Trekkie: The Internet is for porn!
Kate: What are you doing!?
Trekkie: Why you think the net was born?
Porn! Porn! Porn!

Kate: Treee-kkie!
Trekkie: Oh! Hello, Kate Monster.
Kate: You are ruining my song!
Trekkie: Oh me sorry, me no mean to.
Kate: Well, if you wouldn't mind please being quiet for a minute so I can finish?
Trekkie: Okie dokie!
Kate: Good!

I'm glad we have this new technology...
Trekkie: For porn!
Kate: Which gives us untold opportunity.
Trekkie: For por-oops, sorry!
Kate: From your own desktop.
Trekkie: For ---
Kate: You can research, browse and shop...
Trekkie: Mm!
Kate: Until you've had enough and you're ready to stop.
Trekkie: FOR PORN!!
Kate: Trekkie!

Trekkie: The Internet is for porn!
Kate: Nooo!
Trekkie: The Internet is for porn!
Kate: Trekkie!
Trekkie: Me up all night honking me horn to
Porn, porn, porn!

Kate: That's gross! You're a pervert.
Trekkie: Ah, sticks and stones, Kate Monster.
Kate: No really, you're a pervert. Normal people don't sit at home and look at porn on the Internet
Trekkie: Ohhhh?
Kate: What?!
Trekkie: You have no idea! Ready, normal people?
Brian: Ready!
Gary: Ready!
Rod: Ready!
Trekkie: Lemmie hear it!

Trekkie and guys: The Internet is for porn!
Princeton: Sorry, Kate!
Trekkie and guys: The Internet is for porn!
Princeton: I masturbate!
Trekkie and guys: All these guys unzip their flies for
Porn, porn, porn!
Kate: The Internet is not for porn!!
Trekkie and guys: PORN, PORN, P---
Kate: HOLD ON A SECOND!
Trekkie: What?

Kate: Now I happen to know for a fact that you, Rod, check your portfolio and trade stocks online.
Rod: That's correct.
Kate: And Brian, you buy things on Amazon.com.
Brian: Sure!
Kate: And Gary, you keep selling your possesions on Ebay.
Gary: Yes I do!
Kate: And Princeton, you sent me that sweet online birthday card.
Princeton: True!
Trekkie: Oh, but Kate, what you think he do after? Hmm?
Princeton: Yeah.
Kate: EEEWWWWW!

Trekkie and guys: The Internet is for porn!
Kate: Gross!
Trekkie and guys: The Internet is for porn!
Kate: I hate porn!
Trekkie and guys: Grab your dick and double-click...
Kate: UGH!
Trekkie and guys: ...for porn, porn, porn!
Kate: I hate men!
Trekkie and guys: {in harmony} Porn, porn, porn, porn
Kate: I'm leaving!
Trekkie and guys: Porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn
Kate: I hate the Internet!
Trekkie and guys: Porn, porn, porn, porn
Trekkie:The Internet is for
Trekkie and some: Internet is for
Trekkie and all: Internet is for PORN!
Trekkie: YEAH!